THE TOYS TO HAVE 3






Category: The Game Of The Wonderful Islands

Then we have "beefeaters," (Footnote; The warders in the Tower of London
are called "beefeaters"; the origin of the term is obscure.) Indians,
Zulus, for whom there are special rules. We find we can buy lead dogs,
cats, lions, tigers, horses, camels, cattle, and elephants of a
reasonably corresponding size, and we have also several boxes of railway
porters, and some soldiers we bought in Hesse-Darmstadt that we pass off
on an unsuspecting home world as policemen. But we want civilians very
badly. We found a box of German from an exaggerated curse of militarism,
and even the grocer wears epaulettes. This might please Lord Roberts and
Mr. Leo Maxse, but it certainly does not please us. I wish, indeed, that
we could buy boxes of tradesmen: a blue butcher, a white baker with a
loaf of standard bread, a merchant or so; boxes of servants, boxes of
street traffic, smart sets, and so forth. We could do with a judge and
lawyers, or a box of vestrymen. It is true that we can buy Salvation
Army lasses and football players, but we are cold to both of these. We
have, of course, boy scouts. With such boxes of civilians we could have
much more fun than with the running, marching, swashbuckling soldiery
that pervades us. They drive us to reviews; and it is only emperors,
kings, and very silly small boys who can take an undying interest in
uniforms and reviews.

And lastly, of our railways, let me merely remark here that we have
always insisted upon one uniform gauge and everything we buy fits into
and develops our existing railway system. Nothing is more indicative of
the wambling sort of parent and a coterie of witless, worthless uncles
than a heap of railway toys of different gauges and natures in the
children's playroom. And so, having told you of the material we have,
let me now tell you of one or two games (out of the innumerable many)
that we have played. Of course, in this I have to be a little
artificial. Actual games of the kind I am illustrating here have been
played by us, many and many a time, with joy and happy invention and no
thought of publication. They have gone now, those games, into that
vaguely luminous and iridescent into which happiness have tried out
again points in world of memories all love-engendering must go. But we
our best to set them and recall the good them here.






Next: THE GAME OF THE WONDERFUL ISLANDS

Previous: THE TOYS TO HAVE 2



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